


Conjugal Visits

by kitten_michael



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Breaking and Entering, Cop!Reader, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Minor Character Death, Minor Violence, Smut, criminal!Bucky
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-18
Updated: 2018-06-18
Packaged: 2019-05-25 04:25:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14969060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kitten_michael/pseuds/kitten_michael
Summary: "Something has been brought to my attention Miss y/l/n that I'm very much hoping isn't true.""And what might that be Mr. Stark?""Someone on the force who is only looking out for your well being mentioned to me that you've started seeing Mr. Barnes again.""I don't see how it's anyone's business but my own who I date.""Normally that'd be true, but he is not just any normal guy now is he? You are a police officer, sworn to uphold the law and protect the citizens of New York. Having an affair with the suspect in a theft case while he awaits trial doesn't give me a great deal of confidence in your judgement.Some might even think you were complicit in his crimes, that because of your relationship you never told anyone what he was doing to protect him.""My relationship with him has in no way skewed my judgment of right and wrong, what he did was wrong and he's going to go to trial for it just like anyone else. I'm not on the jury sir so my opinion doesn't matter in that way."





	Conjugal Visits

**Author's Note:**

> This is the final part! Sorry it took almost a month to get out, but my motivation/inspiration waned at times and made it hard to write, plus its almost 8000 words long. I hope you guys enjoy and I am going to write an epilogue which will get posted really soon I promise

"Jaaames." You whine wrapping the sheets around your naked body and sitting up in the plush king sized bed. You pout when you turn your head to see that he's not there. You know he couldn't have gone far with the tether around his ankle but you hated waking up without him beside you.

"In the bathroom angel." He calls out a smirk evident in his voice. He loved how clingy you were to him, especially after two months without you and now you weren't very apt to let him go again.

"Come back to bed darling." You pout your thighs clenching as you remember the night before. You'd come over for a romantic dinner that Bucky had cooked for you and after dinner things heated up pretty quickly. After making out for a few minutes he'd pulled you over one of his thick thighs grinding your hips against the material of his jeans. The filthy words pouring from his lips egged you on your hips were grinding into him with fervor and it eventually pushed you over into your first climax of the night.

"Stop biting your lip like that darling it makes me want to do very naughty things to you." He says and it startles you out of your thoughts, you hadn't even noticed him return to the bed. His hands find their way around your waist and he pulls you into his lap his chest pressed t your back and his lips kiss just under your ear.

"I think we've had enough naughty, you've already fucked me on every possible surface." You giggle wiggling in his lap and he squeezes your sides.

"There's no such thing." He chuckles his voice raspy and thick from sleep and it sends a shiver up your spine. "Besides I know the thoughts that caused that lip bite were far from innocent."

"You can't prove it." You say mock sternly crossing your arms over your chest.

"Oh but I think I can." He hums sliding a hand between your thighs and when the cold fingers of his metal hand make contact with your wet lips you gasp and shiver. A whimper parts your lips when the fingers begin circling your clit but they're gone just as quickly as they had appeared and you whine desperatly.

"Just as I thought princess, you're soaking wet for me already." He chuckles bringing the fingers to his lips and sucking your juices off of them.

"Can I have another taste sugar?" He croons his voice smooth as velvet, he knew exactly what he was doing. He knew you couldn't resist him when he used that voice on you. Your legs basically spread of their own accord and you hear him chuckle cockily. He moves from under you so that you're laying on your back and he kisses his way down your stomach sucking a few hickies along the way and your hips rock up desperate for friction.

"Promise I'm gonna take care of you doll." He rasps looking up at you from between your thighs. "All morning long."

Your bubble of happiness is burst when you return to the apartment you share with your ex-best friend that you're still not on speaking terms with. He's in the living room watching a game on tv when you step into the flat and he doesn't even look up at you his focus on the screen never wavering. You scoff and make your way into the kitchen to grab a snack, prepared to stay in your room the rest of the night. Before you make it to your room though you hear him say something to you.

"Did you have fun canoodling with the criminal?" He snaps and you tense, fists clenched by your sides.

"You're lucky I don't fucking knock your teeth in Rogers." You snarl taking your snack and walking away. You hold back the tears threatening to spill down your cheeks as every harsh word he's said to you in the last three weeks since the fight and you getting back with Bucky plays through your mind. You plop down in your bed face first burrying your face in the pillows and you just let out a long, loud scream, getting all your frustration and anger out. You wanted more than anything to call Bucky and just cry to him but you didn't want to cause any more trouble so whenever he asked how things with you and Steve were you just told him that everything was fine, that he didn't really talk to you and it was fine that way. But you weren't okay, you were quite the opposite. You wanted nothing more than to leave and never come back.

You had gotten a new partner at work though which you were grateful for. Her name was Wanda and she was still a bit new to things so you'd taken her under your wing. She reminded you so much of yourself when you had been that young and hopeful. She was also one of the only other people that knew you'd started dating Barnes again and she thought it was all quite romantic.

You sit up in bed, wipe the tears from your cheeks, and try to take some deep breaths to calm yourself down but your phone starts to buzz just then. You reach into your pocket to pull out your phone and you grow a little pale seeing Bucky's name on the screen. You wouldn't be able to hide the fact that you'd just been crying all that well and you knew he'd ask questions.

"Hey, baby." You whisper picking up the phone, your voice sounds thick and a little watery and you're cursing to yourself, fingers crossed that he doesn't notice. "I'm missing you already."

"Are you okay darlin'? You sound like you've been crying." He says his voice soft and full of concern. You almost start to cry again because he was so damn perfect, always so caring and just so soft with you.

"I'm fine handsome, I've just been watching a rom-com since I got home." You lie seamlessly and you feel guilty for doing so.

"Oh alright petal. Well I just wanted tell you again how much I love you and I want you to have nothing but sweet dreams." He says in a tender voice and your heart swells in your chest a few tears slipping from the corners of your eyes.

"I love you too Bucky, so damn much." You whisper back wishing he was there to kiss you goodnight, but you had a rule that you didn't stay at his place when you had to be at work the next day.

"Goodnight angel, I'll see you next weekend." He hums and his voice almost lilts you to sleep your body feeling much warmer since talking to him.

"Good night, my love." You yawn laying back against the pillows and he keeps talking in low deep voice just whispering sweet nothing's to you until you fall asleep.

The next morning at work you were called into your sergeants office and you knew this couldn't end well. You were tense as you step inside closing the door behind you.

"Good morning Sergeant." You say stepping closer to his desk.

"Please take a seat y/n." He says his voice lacking any specific emotion and you didn't know how to gauge things but you sit anyways. "Something has been brought to my attention Miss y/l/n that I'm very much hoping isn't true."

"And what might that be Mr. Stark?"

"Someone on the force who is only looking out for your well being mentioned to me that you've started seeing Mr. Barnes again."

"I don't see how it's anyone's business but my own who I date."

"Normally that'd be true, but he is not just any normal guy now is he?" You're tense under his intense gaze and your jaw is tight in anger. "You are a police officer, sworn to uphold the law and protect the citizens of New York. Having an affair with the suspect in a theft case while he awaits trial doesn't give me a great deal of confidence in your judgement."

"My relationship with him has in no way skewed my judgment of right and wrong, what he did was wrong and he's going to go to trial for it just like anyone else. I'm not on the jury sir so my opinion doesn't matter in that way."

"Some might think you were complicit in his crimes, that because of your relationship you never told anyone what he was doing to protect him."

"You know that isn't true, sir, I had no idea what he did until the day Clint brought him in." You say raising your voice in anger.

"Are you willing to take a lie detector test to prove you had no part in what he did?" Your jaw clenches and you bite back the snarky comment you desperately want to make.

"If that's what it takes for me to stay on the force." You whisper and he simply nods his head.

"That is all for now, and y/n I hope you know when to stay away from things that might end up burning you." He says dismissively and you get up swiftly exiting his office. You make your way to the locker room a permanent scowl on your lips as you search for Steve in the crowd of other officers and detectives. You spot him on the other side of the room and you make your way over to him your anger boiling over as you get closer to him. You grab his wrist and yank him into an empty conference room thanking god the blinds are down because you smack him hard across the cheek.

"How dare you tell Tony about my personal life, you have no fucking right!" You yell the anger of the last few weeks spilling over.

"When I feel that you've compromised your integrity as a police officer I most certainly do have a right." He bites back.

"Fuck you, Rogers, actually I take that back because you weren't very good at it." You snarl turning on your heel to leave but he grabs your wrist pulling you back in.

"I wouldn't get so cocky y/n." He growls before letting go of your wrist. "Your world just might come crashing down around you."

"Trial starts next week." Bucky whispers his shoulders tense and his voice is hollow, nerves fluttering in his stomach. It'd been a few weeks since the lie detector ordeal which you'd passed easily. Bucky had been pissed about that and you were thankful for the thousandth time he couldn't leave the apartment because he really wanted to kick Steve's ass.

"Has your lawyer been preparing you for when you take the stand?" You ask wrapping your arms around his shoulders your head resting in the crook of his neck. You can feel him nod but he stays silent and this is the quietest he's been around you in the last month and a half. You frown pressing soft kisses against the base of his throat.

"I want you to stay here, in my place, when I'm gone." He says quietly. "I've set up my account so that the bills will be paid automatically, you wouldn't have to worry about any of that, and you'd be away from Steve."

"I-I don't know Buck it'd be so painful to be here without you."

"I'll be home before you know it though darlin'." He whispers kissing the top of your head.

"You don't know that, you have no way of knowing what your sentence is gonna be." You say your voice shaky.

"Just please at least consider it." He sighs the fingers on his flesh hand rubbing slow circles against your hip.

"I'll give you an answer by Wednesday." You whisper curling further agaisnt his side another silence falling between the two of you.

"This could be your permanent home, ya know." He whispers a few minutes later. "You wouldn't have to uproot everything and move again."

The thought of this being your forever home with Bucky once he's gotten out of jail makes a warm fuzzy feeling spring up in your tummy. You think of helping redecorate with him so that the decor is a perfect blend of both your tastes; him carrying you over the threshold as you return from your honeymoon, the two of you christening the apartment; and you imagine raising children with him here happy little boys or girls that resemble both of you. The thought fills you with nervous hope and you start crying quietly into the fabric of his t-shirt.

"Oh darling I didn't mean to make you cry, I'm so sorry." He says pulling back to look at you, his hands cupping your cheeks.

"Its okay James, they're happy tears." You giggle and he wipes the tears from your cheeks.

"Does that mean you'll move in here?" He asks brushing some hair away from your face.

"Yes, I'll move in." You nod and he leans in pressing a tender kiss to your lips.

Things did not go over well when you told Steve you were moving out. You hadn't even told him you were moving into Bucky's place but he'd assumed it and he was furious.

"You're wasting your time on a guy you'll likely never even get to see again! A sneaky, coniving thief! I just don't get it, I have been here for you all along, I'm a good man who loves you and you'd rather be with that prick!"

"You don't love me Steve, real love requires respect and you don't respect me. You think I'm obligated to love you back because you were my friend for years but that's not how love works. At least when I'm with Bucky he respects me and the decisions I make for myself. That's the big difference between you and him. That's why I love him."

"Whatever, fine go live with the soon to be convicted felon, I hope you have a very happy life of prison visitations." He scoffs going to his room and slamming the door.

You groan loudly looking around the apartment wondering where to start, because for the second time in about two months you had to pack up all of your things up and move to a new home. This time though you were sure that you were making the right move.

The day of his trial came quickly and you were both so nervous that most of the morning getting ready was spent in silence. You were both scared, not knowing what the outcome of the day was going to be and you weren't ready to say goodbye. You make him his favorite breakfast and tie his tie for him once he's finished getting dressed. He looked so handsome but it was bittersweet due to the circumstances.

"You're going to be there, right?" He says resting a hand over one of yours before you've finished. You look up at him the tie still in your hands not tightened all the way and you nod your head.

"Of course, I'm leaving right after your attorney picks you up." You whisper leaning up to press a soft kiss to his lips.

"I'm gonna miss you so much doll." He says and his voice cracks making you begin to tear up.

"I'm gonna visit Buck I promise, I'm not gonna miss a single visitation day." You whisper your lips brushing his cheek.

"I'll look forward to it." He says a soft smile now on his lips.

His attorney and a police officer you knew in passing show up twenty minutes later and they take his tether off. You hug him tightly one last time sharing a deep kiss before they put him in cuffs and take him down to the town car waiting outside.

"I love you Buck." You say with tears spilling down your cheeks your voice full of sadness.

"I love you too, moya lyubov." He says and then they take him out the front door and down to the car. You watch from the front window as they drive away towards the courthouse. You finish getting dressed taking an uber to the courthouse and you're escorted to the court room his trial is supposed to be taking place in. The triall was set to begin at ten a.m. on the dot and when the time comes and goes you begin feeling anxious, these things were usually never late.

Another twenty minutes passes and you begin to get antsy unable to sit still in your seat and you get up to ask the balif what was taking so long. He was reluctant to share information with you until you show him your badge and he sighs explaining that they were in the process of working on a plea deal so that they wouldn't have to go through with the triall. Your brow furrows in confusion, Bucky had never mentioned a plea deal, but you wonder if that's why he seemed so sure that he'd be out "before you know it."

"Will I be able to see him before they take him away?" You ask your voice shaky, hoping your goodbyes this morning wouldn't be the last you saw of him until the first visitation day.

"Who are you in relation to the defendant?" He asks incredulously.

"I'm his wife." You say softly, the lie falling from your lips easily. The judgemental look he gives you fills you with anger but you don't say anything not wanting to lose any chance you might have at seeing Buck one last time.

"Follow me." He scoffs walking you out of the court room and down several hallways until you get to a conference room.

"Wait out here." He says sternly before stepping inside the room. He's inside for no more than a minute before he comes back out to get you. "The judge says you can sit in."

"Thank you." You say softly stepping past the balif and into the room. Your eyes instantly land on Bucky and a sad smile turns up the corners of your lips, his eyes meet yours and he returns the smile making your insides feel a little fuzzy.

"Ms. Y/l/n, you can sit over there, but please do not interject, we're almost through, and then I will give you three minutes alone before we take him." The judge says motioning to a chair in the left corner of the room and you nod in understanding taking the seat without a word.

"Mr. Barnes do we have an agreenent? Nine months in a state prison, and then 2 years probation and community service?" The judge asks him and your eyes go wide, you were expecting things to be much worse and you wondered what Bucky had done to get such a light sentence.

"Yes sir, we have an agreement." Bucky says his voice still slightly gravelly from sleep and possibly from crying, his tone cold and distant.

"Then I believe we are all done here, I will finish all the paper work and you will leave tomorrow Mr. Barnes." He says shaking Bucky's hand as well as his attorneys before be stands and leaves the room.

"I'll leave you two alone for a few minutes to say your goodbyes. Ms. Y/l/n no funny business alright?" The attorney says his tone light and you know he's trying to lighten the mood which makes you smile.

"Thank you Phil." You say softly standing up and walking over to Bucky as his attorney the officer in the room leave.

"Why didn't you tell me about the deal?" You ask as soon as the door is shut.

"I wasn't supposed to talk about it doll, but I tried to give you hints." He chuckles sadly and reaches out wanting to wrap his arms around you but the handcuffs keep him from doing so and he frowns his bottom lip sticking out in a pout. You wrap your arms around him instead, hugging his side and nuzzling under his chin.

"What did you have to do to get that good of a deal?" You ask curiously your lips moving against his neck.

"Its nothing you need to worry about darling." He whispers and you frown slightly pulling back to look up at his face. "The important thing is that the nine months are gonna pass by in a flash and then I'll be home for good."

"Just behave, keep your head down, don't piss anyone off. I would really like you coming back in one piece."

"I promise to be on my best behavior the whole time." He says leaning down to kiss your forehead. "There's one more thing I wanted to tell you before I go, I left my credit cards and some cash in my night stand for you in case of emergencies."

"Buck you didn't have to do that." You whisper tenderly cupping his cheek in your left hand.

"It'll just ease my mind while I'm gone knowing that its there if you need it."

"I love you, James." You reply those words the only thing you could think to say, they held so much more in them than just an I love you. They were an I'll miss you every single day, and a thank you for always taking care of me as much as well. You press up on your toes to bring your lips to his sharing a tender kiss that was over too soon as his attorney and two officers come back into the room to escort him to a cell.

"I love you too, Angel. Nine months and then we'll be together again." He says over his shoulder, the door closes on him before you can even respond and the feeling of loneliness begins to sink in already. You take a moment to yourself in the conference room letting yourself cry before you pull yourself together to exit the building going back to Bucky's apartment.

Once you're home you go to make yourself some lunch and you look around the cupboards realizing that they're a little bare because Bucky mostly ordered takeout. You weren't in the mood to order out though, you wanted to cook so you'd have something specific to focus on so you decide to run to the store and get some groceries for the next few weeks.

You walk down the aisles of the grocery store adding things to your cart that you know you like and can easily make meals out of but your blood runs cold when you pass a display for tampons and your feet stop dead in their tracks. It hits you that you've missed your period, it should have been two weeks ago and you don't know how it had managed to slip your mind.

You begin to feel your heart rate pick up and you make a beeline for the aisle with pregnancy tests grabbing one from the shelf and toss it into the cart. You try to get the rest of your shopping done but you feel nauseous with anxiety your mind racing with thoughts that you very well might be pregnant. Eventually the nerves get the better of you and you just head to the checkout without everything you'd planned on getting, wanting to get home as quickly as possible.

The lines all seem to move insanely slow as you wait to get checked out and you groan in frustration the whole way until your able to unload your cart and the cashier begins ringing your items. You know its psychological but you swear when the older woman rings up the pregnancy test she gives you a bit of a dirty look and your stomach sinks even further. You pull your card and and slide it into the chip reader waiting for the obnoxious beep to pull it out. You grab all of your bags and leave the store quickly and before you know it you're back home, slamming the door closed with your elbow. The groceries are set on the kitchen counter and you rummage through them until you find the pregnancy test.

Five minutes later you're sitting on the bathroom floor with the test in your hand waiting for the results. You've set the timer on your phone for ten minutes and now all you could do was sit here until it went off. You didn't know what you were going to do if you were pregnant, you had always wanted kids but not quite at this tine in your life. They were something you saw in your future, but maybe now you didn't have that option. When the timer goes off you hold your breath as you bring the test back into view and the little pink plus sign stared you in the face telling you that you were going to be a mom.

Three days had gone by since you took the pregnancy test and you still hadn't told anyone yet. You were still in shock and you knew there were few people that would be thrilled about the news, plus you really wanted Bucky to be the first to know it was his baby too. But that would mean you'd have to wait three more weeks for a visitation day to be able to tell him, and you weren't sure how youd keep it a secret that long.

When Natasha invites you to go out to dinner with you that weekend you know that it won't stay a secret for long. She'd know as soon as you order just water instead of a bottle of wine for the table. You were screwed. You accept anyways and the night of you get ready around five and meet Nat at the usual restaurant around six.

"Hey, how're you holding up?" She asks giving you a quick side hug before taking her seat at the table.

"I'm alright, I guess. As good as I can be for someone who's boyfriend just went off to prison." You mumble a wry smile on your lips. "Thanks for inviting me out though, I think this is what I needed."

"I figured you'd need to get out of the house, now that you're all alone." She says giving you a genuine smile, which was rare from her. The waiter comes to take your order and Nat orders wine like you figured she would and when he looks at you you simply reply iced tea with lemon hoping that makes it less obvious that you're hiding something. It doesnt, Natasha cocks an eywbrow looking at you curiously.

"Iced tea with lemon, are you pregnant?" She asks her voice mock serious but theres mischief in her eyes. You gulp feeling warm under her gaze and you start to sweat just a little bit.

"Oh my god you are!" She yells and people at the tables around you turn to stare making your fave feel warmer.

"Nat shush!" You whisper yell avoiding the stares. "Yes I'm pregnant, I found out three days ago."

"Oh my god, is it Bucky's or Steve's?" She asks and you glare in response.

"Its Bucky's." You say firmly. "I have no question in my mind about it."

"Have you made an appointment with an ob/gyn?"

"No, not yet, I'm still in shock, I hadn't even thought of that yet." You admit. "I really wanted Bucky to be the first one to find out but I can't go see for another two and a half weeks."

"How do you think he'll take the news?"

"I'm almost certain that he'll be excited." You giggle sadly picturing what his face might look like at hearing that he's going to be a dad.

"He'll be out just in time for the birth, which is kind of perfect." Nat says trying to keep things positive amd you smile thankfully at her.

"That's true, I just don't know what its gonna be like doing this all by myself for nine months."

"You aren't alone, you have me, and your whole station to support you."

"I doubt any of them will be that thrilled, they've almost all turned on me since Steve and I had our falling out. Dating a guy that went to jail instead of the "well rounded" best friend really pisses people off."

"Idiots." She scoffs rolling her eyes. "Men are idiots, Steve especially but all of them are."

"Yeah tell me something I don't know." You chuckle and just then the waiter comes with your drinks and to take your order.

You take a deep breath in, holding it for a few seconds before slowly releasing it. You repeat the action a few times trying to calm your racing heartbeat as you sit at a small table in a room that slightly resembles a high school cafeteria but more gray and depressing. You had never been so nervous to tell someone anything in your whole life, or excited. This was your first time seeing Bucky in three weeks and you had your first ultrasound to show him once you gave him the news.

After your dinner with Nat you'd scheduled the ob/gyn appointment and they'd given your first ultra sound. When he showed you where your baby was at on the screen you'd started crying even though it was no bigger than a grape at the time seeing it just made it that much more real for you.

"Y/n!" Bucky calls pulling you from your thoughts and you look up seeing that he's standing right above where you're seated. His smile beams down at you and your heart feels warm and gooey in your chest.

"Hi baby." You say standing up to give him a hug and one of the gaurds yells in your direction to remind you physical contact isn't allowed. You frown and that warm bubbly feeling dissipates a little bit so you take your seat again, Bucky doing the same.

"God doll, you really are a sight for sore eyes. I can't begin to tell you how much I've been missing you." He says in that smooth voice that always gets you and your cheeks flush with warmth.

"I miss you too, Buck, but t-there's something I have to tell you." You say softly, your voice shaking with nerves and you see fear flash behind his eyes. "Its nothing bad baby, at least I don't think it is."

You see him release a heavy breath and his shoulder relax and your eyes crinkle a little bit a grin finding its way onto your lips.

"Bucky, baby, I'm pregnant." You bite your lip nervously awaiting his response. His eyes widen, pupils a blown a bit and you brace yourself, not sure what he was going to say.

"We're gonna have a baby?" He asks his eyes glancing down at your belly, but you hadn't changed much yet, though Nat said you seemed to have a glow to your skin now.

"Mhmm, I'm almost two months along." You whisper and you set the ultrasound picture down on the table. "That little grape sized dot right there, that's our baby."

"I didn't think it was possible to love you any more than before but suddenly now I do." He chuckles a dazzling smile lighting up his lips and you giggle like a school girl.

"So you're happy? About becoming a dad?"

"Absolutely, I've always wanted to have kids and I can't think of anyone I'd wanna start a family with more than you angel." He hums and he gives you a wink. "I only wish I could be there for you through all of this."

"Its okay, I've got Natasha and so far she's been a big help. She's surprisingly got a soft side for kids. I'm just happy knowing you're okay with this."

"Did you think I wouldn't be?" He asks cocking an eyebrow.

"Visitation is over, inmates you must return to your cells, visitors report back to the desk to return your badges." A guard calls out and you frown standing from your seat.

"No Bucky, I didn't think you wouldn't be, I was just nervous." You say looking down at him with sad eyes, not wanting to leave him. "I've gotta go but I'll see you again next month, I love you Buck."

"I love you too doll, more than anything."

You stayed true to you word never missing a visitation and Bucky was ecstatic to watch the progress as your baby bump grew and the baby became more and more visible in the ultrasound pictures. He was more than happy about becoming a dad and he even helped you with ideas for the nursery. You always brought catalogs with you and he'd help pick out things he liked.

Things without Bucky were kind of dull but Nat spent a lot of time with you, keeping you preoccupied. She was doing all the heavy lifting in preparing Bucky's old den into the baby's room while you supervised.

Since Bucky had been away though you'd noticed some strange activity on your block that you'd tried to chalk up to just paranoia. But as a cop you could just tell something wasn't right. There was a black car that seemed to almost always be parked on your block in the same place everyday, one you'd never seen until a few months ago. And you swore you'd seen it following you around too but you could never catch the licsence plate on it to be sure. It had you really freaked out but you hadn't told anyone about it yet, not Bucky or Natasha or even your partner Wanda who'd been a big help in keeping you sane these last six months as well.

Things became more sinister when you arrived home one night after work to find that a window was opened that you knew for a fact had been closed when you left that morning. You immediately reach for the gun you keep hidden in the umbrella stand by the front door.

You didn't see anybody but you had a sense, the hair on the back of your neck standing on end as you step further into your home the gun held firmly in your grip. You look around assessing your familiar settings and you see a shadow in the shape of a mans body in the curtains that flutter in front of the open window and you creep over that way trying to be as quiet as possible.

What you don't realize is that theres another guy on the other side of the apartment and when your back is turned he fires a shot hitting you in the shoulder and you let out a yelp from the pain. He keeps shooting so you drop to the floor to avoid the bullets, scrambling to get behind the couch. Pain shoots through your shoulder as you crawl across the floor and when you're behind the couch you peak your head up to assess where he's at.

"Come on out and face me sweetheart!" He calls out his voice full of menace it sends chills down your spine. "Your boyfriend had the balls to rat out his entire crew and now you have to pay that price for him."

"Son of a bitch!" You snarl under your breath. That's how Buck had gotten off with a lighter sentence! You didn't have the time to be pissed at him for not telling you but if you got out of this alive you were definitely gonna give him an earful the next time you saw him. You were thanking god for your years of training as you bring your gun up and fire a shot right through his stomach which takes him down. You stand up to check the fire escape only to find that the guy you thought you'd saw had only been a dummy and just then you feel a sharp pain split through your middle. You let out a blood-curdling shriek tears gushing in the corners of your eyes but you attempt hold it together to call 911.

"I need a medic and, and police I I've been shot and I think I'm going into labor!" You wheeze, your breathing out of control and you felt another stab of pain, a pathetic whimper passing your lips.

"We're sending someone right now, can you tell me what your apartment number is?"

"Iss uh D6." The words are slurred as they leave you your vision getting blurry. Between the wound in your shoulder and the pain splitting through your torso you were starting to feel out of it. You don't remember much after that your vision going black.

You wake up three days later in the hospital, very little memory of what happened. Your eyes open grogilly your vision a little blurred as you around the room, you see all the machines and the beeping and whirring noises surrounding you register in your brain. You begin to panic a little bit and you scramble around to find the call button calling a nurse into the room.

"Ms. Y/l/n, you're awake." She hums a pleasant smile on her lips. "Do you remember any of the events three days ago?"

"N-no, not really, w-what happened?"

"You were shot, and the shock of it forced you into early labor. You had to have your baby a few nights ago."

"What?! Where are they? Where's my baby? What did I have?" You cry hysterically, you'd wanted so badly for Bucky to be there, and to actually have some memory of it. But that asshole had taken that away from you.

"She's doing okay, she's in the nicu being taken care of. If you're feeling up to it later we can take you to see her."

"I-I wanna see her right now." You stammer, attempting to sit up and your vision gets fuzzy for a moment.

"Not right now dear, you need more rest you've been through a lot and the more rest you get the better."

"Is she going to be okay? She's three months early."

"We're doing our best, she seems to be doing quite well under these circumstances."

"H-has anyone been here, to see me?"

"Yes, you've had quite a few visitors, a friend named Natasha as well as some police officers. They want to ask you questions about that night." You nod slowly and your mind wanders to Bucky.

"C-can I have a moment alone? I need to make a phone call." You whisper picking up the phone from the bedside table. The nurse just nods and leaves your room closing the door behind her. You dial the familiar number and ask for Bucky when the gaurd asks who you're calling for and they put you on hold for five mimutes. In that time you think about how you're going to explain all of this to him.

"Oh doll I can't begin to tell you how happy I am you called." Bucky says finally picking up the phone and you feel your chest get tight hearing his voice so full of happiness and knowing you were about to crush it. "How are you darling?"

"I uh I could be better. Someone broke into the apartment and attacked me, and I ended up," Tears well up in your eyes and your voice gets thick struggling to choke out the words. "I had to have the baby early."

Theres a brief pause and you brace yourself for his response, figuring he needed a moment to process what you'd just said to him. You can hear him breathing down the line and if it didn't hurt like hell you know your shoulders would be tense right now.

"Are you okay? Where were you shot?" He says and you can tell his teeth are gritted in frustration and concern.

"I think I'll be fine, it was in my right shoulder. I'll probably have to do some physical therapy once the wound has healed, but it's definitely not as bad as it could have been."

"A-and how's the baby? Do you know what we had?"

"We have a little girl. They say she's doing fairly well for someone as premature as she was, but they won't let me see her yet. They want me to keep resting, I've been asleep for three days."

"I'm so sorry I'm not there baby." You can hear him getting choked up, trying to suppress it.

"T-they said they wanted me to pay for you ratting them out." You whisper your heart breaking as the memory washes over you and you flinch thinking back to when you shot the man.

"This all my fault, and I'm so sorry y/n." He breaths his voice just completely broken. "I'm sorry I pulled you into my mess."

Just then Steve steps into the room and you look up at him frowning. He realizes you're in the phone and gives you an apologetic look quietly taking a seat in the chair in the corner of the room.

"B-Bucky, I gotta go, I'll talk to you soon, I'll be there at the next visitation I promise, I love you so much." You say quickly and you hear say I love you back before you hang up.

"What're you doing here?" You ask turning abruptly to look at Steve your eyes narrowed.

"To check up on you, make sure you and the baby are okay." He says with real concern behind his words.

"Tony sent you to ask me questions right?"

"No actually Clint is supposed to be coming to do that, I'm here as a friend who cares about you." He sighs rubbing his hand over his face in frustration. "I want to apologize and make amends for things that have happened recently between us."

"I'm not forgiving you. Not for the things you said to me that night, you were cruel. You have no right to expect anything from me because I've been nice to you all these years, or because you've been nice to me all these years."

"I know, and I'm sorry for saying that, it wasn't true. I didn't become your friend for that reason and I'm not your friend for that reason. The feelings came years later when we were in the academy together." He sighs. "I was just very angry that night and upset because I knew you'd already chose Bucky over me, even when you were still mad at him. And I had no right to say the things I did but I hope you can forgive me some day."

"Its not gonna happen over night, you are gonna have to do an awful lot of groveling to make it up to me."

"Whatever it takes for you to be my best friend again." He chuckles giving you a crinkly eyed smile.

"Convince the nurses to let me go see my little girl and you'll earn some of my good graces back." You say cracking a surprising smile.

"Consider it done." He hums getting up and exiting the room putting on his ultra charming face as he walks up to the nurses station. You giggle to yourself knowing he'd make all those nurses swoon. Within five minutes he's back with a young female nurse following closely behind him and bringing a wheelchair in with her.

"I think we can manage taking you to see your daughter Miss y/l/n. You seem to be doing quite well today." She says walking around to the left side of the bed. I just gotta unhook a few things, reconnect some other things and then we should be all set."

"Thank you. It feels weird not having seen my own baby and she's been here for three days. Wanna see if she looks more like me or Buck." You giggle trying to keep things light hearted but you were so nervous knowing she was going to be underdeveloped.

"Doll she's beautiful." Bucky coos, his voice so soft it was like melted butter as he looks through pictures of your baby girl Athena. She had been such a fighter since day one, beating the odds of survival. They had told you after two weeks that they hadn't expected she'd make it past the first two weeks. She was two months old now and she was getting so big you couldn't believe it.

"Isn't she? She's got your eyes." You hum a bright smile on your face just thinking about her. You had never thought you'd love anyone or anything as much as you loved Bucky but then she came into the world and had completly changed all of it.

"Yeah but everything else is all you, luckily." He chuckles his eyes twinkling with love and adoration and you wanted so badly to lean across the table and kiss him.

"I can't wait for you to be home, so we can be a proper family." You sigh quickly brushing your hand over his.

"About that, I'm getting out two weeks early for good behavior." He says looking at you brightly.

"Buck, that's amazing! How could you have not told me that right away?"

"I got excited about the pictures of Thena." He chuckles bringing your knuckles up to his lips placing a soft kiss to them.

"She's gonna be so excited to finally meet you." You giggle your cheeks flushing with warmth at his gesture.

"And I can't wait to meet her. I'll need you here next weekend to pick me up doll."

"I'll be here bright and early, I'll even bring Athena."

"Now that's settled I've been meaning to ask you, did they ever find out why you were attacked that night?" He asks and you see guilt flash behind his eyes.

"I-I've known why, since the night it happened. He told me that I had to pay for you ratting the crew you worked with out."

"God damn it. That's what I was worried about." He grumbles. "I'm so sorry I've put you and Thena in danger."

"I just wish you had told me, I could have been better protected."

"Part of my deal was that you were supposed to be better protected. They were supposed to be keeping an eye on you. Clearly they failed." He says angrily, but the way he looks at you is soft and tender.

"They aren't gonna stay away forever, we're not gonna be able to stay here, in New York."

"Its not like I can just leave even when I get out of here."

"Leave me to figure that out." You whisper your face serious and just then visitation ends and Bucky watches you confusedly as you walk out.

The End.


End file.
